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Everything You Need to Know About Lesbian Sex

December 10, 2020

Let’s Define Sex First

For many a year, people believed there could only be sex between a man and a woman. In other words, only penetration involving a penis and a vagina was considered sex. Similarly, people believed that “lesbian sex” was a different kind of intercourse between two lesbians. That, however, is a myth we’re going to dispel now. 

For starters, let’s define sex. Despite what many people believe, sex isn’t penis-into-vagina-penetration solely. The list of what sex includes a variety of actions you’d never think are regarded as such. The incomplete list includes:

  • Penetration (penis in vagina)
  • Penetration with sex toys
  • Mutual masturbation
  • Anal sex
  • Oral sex on a vagina, penis, or anus
  • Manual stimulation (fingering, hand job, fisting)
  • Sex toy play with no penetration
  • Clitoral and anal play
  • Boob or nipple play
  • Dry humping

Now that we’ve defined sex in general let’s move on to lesbian sex definition. This act isn’t reserved for women-having-sex-with women only. Lesbian sex involves females who identify as bisexual or pansexual. Further, it may involve cisgender women on the one and a transgender woman on the other hand. Yes, believe it or not, lesbian sex may involve gender identities other than females.  

Therefore, the notion of lesbian sex is far more complicated than we think. It involves a range of sex acts between trans women with dicks, non-lesbian-identifying people with vaginas, and intersex people.  

Is It Better Than Straight Sex?

Which is better, a cat or a dog? Mercedes Benz or BMW? Android or iOS? Windows or Mac? There could never be a correct answer to these questions, as it solely depends on personal preferences. The same applies to lesbian vs. straight sex. Lesbians, i.e., women who are into to other women, will always argue that their sex is way better than straight sex due to several reasons.     

First of all, lesbians never have a problem with erection, as opposed to straight couples. Hence, there is never pressure to get a boner, then to make the penis cum. Similarly, there isn’t a fear of unwanted pregnancy. Some even claim that lesbians have safer sex, as there isn’t a huge risk of STDs either. That, however, is not true and should never be taken for granted. Safety is always first, and sex should never be unprotected. 

Another “pro” in favor of lesbian sex is multiple orgasms. Unlike men, women can cum several times during intercourse. When having sex with another woman, females can not only cum faster but also have stronger and longer orgasms than penetrative sex. The main reason for that is the simulation of the most delicate erogenous zones, primarily the clit and nipples.  

Is There a “Man” in Lesbian Sex?

In lesbian relationships, there isn’t a strict division between “male” and “female” partners. This narrow-minded way of thinking is the main result of “lesbian” porn. In the relationship of two women, neither has to be a “man.” Of course, there are lesbian relationships that have that masculine and feminine concept. However, this is only a preference, not a rule. 

Hence, if one woman penetrates another using a strap-on, her fingers, or hand, this by no means implies that she’s the man. They can easily switch roles along with sex positions. If you want to know how lesbians have sex, you’d better ask one. Don’t make false assumptions based on porn.

Do You Use Sex Toys?

Many people believe that good sex isn’t possible without penetration. Therefore, they think that lesbians can’t have sex without a dildo or strap-on. Those toys are great to spice up the play between the bedsheets. However, they are neither a recipe nor a tool for a memorable time having lesbian sex. 

Additionally, there is a range of other toys besides strap-ons/dildos. Butt plugs, nipple clamps, clit or vagina pumps, BDSM toys, etc., are a fantastic way to raise sex to another level and make it hotter and more sweaty. 

But, it can’t be stressed enough — you need to discuss this with your partner first. They may not be quite fond of sex toys, role play, or BDSM. You can’t just cuff them to the bed and start flogging. If you’re unsure which toys to get, you may ask a sex shop worker for advice or browse lesbian sex tips on the internet, for starters. 

When using toys, make sure that both you and your partner feel comfortable and relaxed. Sex should always feel good, even during the BDSM play. There should never be unpleasant pain or discomfort. Therefore, it’s of utmost importance to talk, talk, and talk when sex toys come into play. 


It is another myth universally acknowledged that lesbian sex is all about scissoring. It indeed is a position typical for lesbian sex. However, it isn’t the only one. What’s more, some lesbians don’t even like it, let alone practice it in their bedroom.

Also known as tribbing, scissoring is a sex position that involves vag-to-vag contact. There isn’t the right way to do it, as long as both your and your partner’s clits get some action. You need to lie either on your side or back. Your partner can lie next to you or be on top of you. Then, intertwine your legs with theirs and start grinding. It may feel awkward for the first time, but when you feel your clit is stimulated, you’ll know that you’re in the right position.

Keep in mind that scissoring isn’t reserved solely for clit-to-clit rubbing. You can go a step forward and rub your vagina against your transgender partner’s penis or the strap-on worn by your female partner. Eventually, it can end up with thrusting and penetration.    

Sexual intercourse may begin with scissoring, or it might be just one of the ways to spice things up. Indeed, some couples prefer scissoring only. On the other hand, some avoid it at all costs. It is a pleasant sexual experience, but it’s, by no means, an absolute requirement for great and memorable sex.    

Keep in mind that scissoring is an advanced position, as it involves and activates various muscles. Hence, you may want to stretch and warm up a bit to avoid any unwanted injuries.   


Lesbian sex isn’t strictly limited to lesbians. It involves having sex with other women of the same or different sexual orientation (i.e., gay or straight), bisexual women, pansexuals, even transgender women who have a penis. 

The entire concept of such sex is entirely different from what you might have learned in porn videos. As opposed to the common misconception, lesbian sex isn’t scissoring only. It involves much more action than you may have thought, a range of sex toys and positions. As opposed to what people may think, it’s not less risky than straight or gay sex, so it’s essential to be protected. Stay safe!

Author: beautifulleopard215